Vonster's edit her life!

oh dear....oh dear........................
everyday night i am thinking of alcohol and ways to 'stone' myself.
i'm getting real fat and not motivated and ugly, i always feel lonely lately. :( :(
i am so out of control!!! emotionally and physically as well.
i don want to be like that! i need to CHANGE!!!!





resolution! is what i need...hmmmm.........i'll think about it 1st, lets get shower.





backs!
to gain back my confident, 1stly is always about appearance.
i realize i dont wear nicely anymore, i often choose to wear something big size for not showing the fats dodging out from my waist :( and soon... i even dont care about how i look anymore..
i am too heavy for heels and i feel uncomfortable everytime when i walk, i always feel the 'frictions' comes from the fats between my legs! hmph!
so, i'm gonna start yoga 1 and 3, basketball 2 and 4, hiking every sunday evening.
TONE UP TONE UP!!!NO MORE KUALA LURAH FOOD! i'm gonna be strict to myself!



i feel so laid back, i'm do not learn or catch things easier than i used to be.
i didnt learn much lately, i used to read books or at least research about some words or culture..
now? all i do is, thinking about guys, friends and gossips??or thinking where to go 'chiong' at saturday night and feel so sad when there's nothing to do on saturday or get upset when my phone is silent whole day. WTF!!!! or online for whole day for FB only Zzzzzzzzzzzz stop!!!!
okaysssssss now! since 1-4 is full for exercising, 5 is for gaining knowledge. i guess right now is to master VRAY!!! and i will read before i sleep like everyday if i am not tired! (right, tomorrow gonna meet pauline up, books books books~)



for career wise, 齐天大圣 told me ‘信心有，光明有’ (its kinda old fashion, but its still very TRUE)
i have to believe in myself. Re-plan and re-schedule everything i have on hands.
i am gonna finish 5 3d perspectives and plan and 2 elevation this week and show it to CALVIN, so that i can write a resign letter as soon as possible and head off to a better company. YESH!!!!!!JIAYOU JIAYOU JIAYOU!





to have a healthier lifestyle, i'm not saying that i will quit smoking... but i will quit drinking!
i admit that i am addicted to beers and wines, and this 'stoning' myself thingy has driving me nuts and i'm getting depress day by day.......and start thinking of un-necessary stuff!



relationship......I dont have a serious one, reason.... everyone just think that i'm playing around when i'm actually not! well, dont want to play mind game anymore, dont want to expect much, dont wan to be disappointed, NO MORE SCANDALS THIS YEAR!




i believe with all these, loneliness go away.. i'm gonna be A happier person again, and u gonna call me, MOTIVA-VON OR AGGRE-VON! HAHAHAHAHAHAA




p/s: it will come back to you if you let it go..........................................byforce is nothing good :)